It is amazing to look out my window and actually see the sun peeking out from behind a cloud today! I didn't think that I would ever see the sun again with all of the rain that we've had here. I gave pause before complaining because of those that have been hit much worse with rain and terrible winds due to the hurricanes in the South. So, I complain with a light touch!
I think that the weather started to affect me spiritually. I have been feeling like I've been in a bit of a spiritual drought lately and wanted God to quench my thirst somehow. Ironically we smashed records with the rainfall we've had and yet, I'm still parched spiritually. It's funny how when we feel numb, indifferent, dry in our faith that we turn to God and ask Him what the problem is. On the one hand, I think that's just what He wants us to do - turn to Him when we feel lost or "lazy". On the other hand, how convenient that God becomes the one I blame for any kind of separation from Him. I have been assured by Scriptures, by theologians, and by oral traditions that God does not separate Himself from us, we do the leaving!
As a parent, I watch this relationship that I have with God and I see me leave; then I see me come back crying and crawling; then I see me leave; then I come back promising never to distance myself again; then I see me leave! Do ya see the pattern? I guess the good news is that I keep coming back but I wonder if God has any of the same frustrations that we earthly parents have with our children just not trusting us to know better. The blaring difference between God and us (quite obvious) is that He NEVER fails in His decision-making or in His immense love for us. I know that I have failed many times (like right now) in making too-quick decisions and in saying "NO" too often instead of taking the time to talk it through. I want to have the kind of love that God has for me and I want my kids to get that from me! To bridge that divide between Heaven and Earth is the key, I guess!
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