Come On!

I'm soooo over Summer right now! I've been doing rain dances and cool weather dances for about 3 days to no avail! I dread showering only to go and sit in the stands at a baseball game in the upper 90s!! So, all you Summer-lovin' people can have your sweltering heat, your beating sun, your sticky wind, and your stroke-inducing humidity! As for me, I'll be counting down to Fall!

I am, however, enjoying Murphy's All-Star baseball games (despite the crappy heat) I will post pictures and updates later. So far, they've won the first game and they play again tonight! Go East Side!!

It Happened!

My heart, my love, my gift! Perhaps the most beautiful and exciting part of my trip to Alaska was that Bill proposed and I said yes! Not perhaps...DEFINITELY!!! I know that many people assumed it would happen but I stopped "planning" my life a few years ago. When I met Bill I decided that I would let God lead me on this path and that I would allow (that sentiment makes me laugh as I dare to think that I know better than God!!) things to unfold according to God's time. I trust God and I trust Bill's timing as he has an awesome relationship with God!

It was the 4th of July. We approached the last night in Alaska. We were on a deck in the back of our hotel in Fairbanks, Alaska. We were remarking how we could not believe it was 11:30 pm and the sun was still shining in our eyes. (I realize that these are all incomplete/run-on sentences but I'm just reporting the facts) It was mentioned that we would be back to the grind in one more day. I whined about his broken air conditioner and clogged drain. I closed my eyes for a moment. Bill was on his knee with MY ring in his hand. I cried. He wondered if that meant yes. I cried some more. YES. YES. YES.

It was the one of the sweetest moments of my life. In a flash I tried to recount our conversations leading up to this moment. In horror, I realized that I had had a few cocktails and so my lips were moving a mile a minute! We had spent some time with his brothers and their wives and I think I had mentioned that my bra did not hook in the front - horror!!! (In context: we were talking about how difficult things are for the elderly - things that we take for granted) So, imagine my surprise that, despite my ability (and talent) to let things fly out of my mouth, that this wonderful man still wants me to be his wife!! He is a gift to me. He has done so much to restore my heart. He loves me for who and for what I am and I will spend the rest of our lives showing him how much I love him!

Upon arriving home, all of the giantness (word?) of the the engagement hit me! I'm just as over the moon as I was in Fairbanks - maybe more, if that's possible?! I realize that this means a move to Cleveland for my kids and me. It will be difficult and quite emotional but I don't want to spend one more moment away from this amazing man! I am cleaving and leaving! I trust that God will keep us protected - I can't exactly trust Him in some parts of our lives but not in others!

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Here is the beautiful ring that Bill picked out for me (with no assistance from myself or from anyone else)

Alaska!

It's hard to believe that I went to Alaska! I have lots of thoughts and pictures and such but I'm still just so stinkin' tired that it will have to wait until I have a little more energy!

Suffice it to say, it was spectacular, wonderful, amazing, beautiful, unique, romantic...

Some Summer Shots

I'm Leaving on a Jet Plane (well a jet plane, then a boat, then a train, then a plane again)

Well, my countdown is about ready to expire! I've been counting down until my Alaskan cruise for the past 63 days and now it's here! Now it's confession time! Are you all ready for it? I'm a homebody! There, I said it! I don't like to sleep in any other bed except for my own - well, maybe the Ritz-Carlton wouldn't be so bad but who am I kidding, I've never been there either! I've never been west of Chicago (do the western suburbs of Chicago count as going west?) I've only been on an airplane 4 times in my whole life and I've never been on a train or a boat.

Enter all of the emotions! I've been a mess today! I'm freaking out because I need to mow, I need to clean the house, I need to grocery shop, I need to jot down all kid activities, I need to change the linens on the bed, I need... This is all a cover-up to hide the fact that I'm going to miss my kids! I've never been away from them for longer than 2 days! I like being in charge of everything, despite the fact that, at times, I hate being in charge of everything! I'm terrified that when I leave, the kids will be better off with their aunts, uncle, and grandparents than they were with me! Will my toilet be clean enough to trick people into thinking that I am this tidy and organized all of the time? Don't even get me started on the bed linens! I'm confessing (another confession?) that I don't sleep with a top sheet but I will make all of the beds with their top sheets so that the rumor doesn't get out that I'm a barbarian! Don't tell anyone, please!!!!!!!

It is more clear, after re-reading this post, that if ever there was a time that I needed a vacation it is now! Just with the ridiculous amounts of exclamation points it is apparent that I'm a little wound up and could use some vacation time. My thing is that I never feel like I deserve it. I can think of other people that kill themselves being the end all be/all for everyone. I know of one of my friends that is the mother of 3 boys (ugh! The stink!!) who takes care of everything and has a husband out of work (so, that means 4 boys at home) and still manages to me make me laugh all of the time. She could use a cruise to Alaska! I have another friend who is the mother of 3 kids that gives and gives and finally can't take it anymore because she's put up this front that she's the caretaker when all she wants to do is be taken care of a time or two. She could use a cruise to Alaska! I could go on and on thinking of every friend that I know of that deserves this more than I do. But, I'm going, darn it!! I really need this and I'm very excited but so nervous!

Please pray for a safe journey for B, his family, and myself! I can't wait to spend some alone time with B - without the pressures of kids, work, cell phones, family, sports, etc. I sure hope he likes "Mellow Kelly" because I'm not sure I've seen her in a very long time!

Fatherless

I know that this post will seem sappy and sad but it's more intended to be the mindless wonderings of a girl lacking some serious sleep! It's that time of year again. Father's day has arrived again with the same old confusion. How do we "celebrate" father's day as fatherless children? We aren't sad and we aren't feeling sorry for ourselves, we just don't know how to acknowledge the 1000 pound elephant in the room. We've made our cards for the men in our lives - Uncle Joe, Uncle Kevin, my Dad, etc. but there's always that pause when people realize there are fatherless kids in the room. It's ok, really! We'll spend it like we have the past three years (inevitably at the ballpark on a 90 degree day) together! We'll trudge through this one day set aside to honor fathers and Monday will poke its ugly head to begin another week.

Then come the big questions! You see, father's day is just any day. It's the odd Wednesday or the emotional Friday that throws me for a loop. I've felt like the biggest tool of a mother. Take back my hardware for Mother of the Year...Wait! What? I never won that? Shocker! My 12 year old son is hormonal and is in a constant stew about something unless he's doing what HE wants to do. Heaven forbid I ask the kid to shower, brush his teeth, unload the dishes, or strip the sheets off his bed! Holy Hannah, you'd think that I just pantsed him in front of a bus full of a cheerleaders! Heck, three months ago I could have pantsed him in front of a bus full of cheerleaders and he wouldn't have cared! Now? I dare not even claim to be his mother around certain people. Just ask me how much I respect THAT boundary! Answer is, I don't! I pour it on even more (I guess I don't need to wonder why he doesn't seem to love me anymore!) He's a great kid...to everyone else! I love him but I'm not in love with him anymore. We've officially broken up and I'm the only one crushed by the whole thing. Him? Not so much - or, better yet, not at all! Sniff...sniff...sniff!

So, begging your pardon for my lack of reverence for this day, I'd prefer to skip father's day and bring on Monday!

I love my father, by the way! He's the best and he's always been there for all of his kids! He's now an amazing grandfather and my kids would be lost without him! He certainly fills so many voids in terms of my fatherless children. I could write a book on the amazing men in my life from my brothers to my brother-in-law to my friends and now to the newest man in our life. I'm very blessed to have wonderful people in my life that show my kids (and myself) that there are great men that are also great coaches, great husbands, great priests, and great fathers. The biggest example of this is my Heavenly Father!

Putting aside my cynicism, if for a brief moment, Happy Father's Day!

A Little Something from Basketball Camp

Gosh! I really love camp! I really, really love camps that have a Christian slant to them and that teach my son (children) that there is more to life than shooting the perfect jumper or pitching the perfect slider. It begins and ends with a good relationship with God.

Murphy has been going to basketball camp and they handed out this little ditty at the end of today's session:

When John Wooden graduated from Centerton Grade School, it was a big occasion. Grade schoolers did not always go on to high school. Children often received a gift from their parents. Joshua Wooden decided to give the gift of wisdom to his son.

On one side of a 3x5 card, Joshua wrote a poem he loved by Rev. Henry Dyke:
Four things a man must do if he would make his life more true->
To think without confusion clearly,
To love his fellow man sincerely,
To act from honest motives purely,
To trust in God and Heaven securely.

On the other side of the card he wrote 7 principles to life:
1. Be true to yourself
2. Help others
3. Make each day your masterpiece
4. Drink deeply from good books - especially the Bible
5. Make friendship a fine art
6. Build a shelter for a rainy day (faith in God)
7. Pray for guidance and counsel and give thanks for your blessings each day

*His dad also gave him a 2 dollar bill and said as long as you keep this 2 dollar bill, you won't be broke...They found the 2 dollar bill in Coach Wooden's wallet after he passed away.

Simple.Amazing.God